laughter and delight

you have such diverse life experience. what do you think led you to the peaceful spot you are now? (as opposed to other more violent, hard, judgmental spots)

An excellent neighbor friend posed that question in her response to a Geezer blog post where I spoke of sitting in the sun on a geezer bench downtown amusing myself by running through the various hand strikes for attacking a person's body. I responded: Laughter and Delight.

True, but what prompts these twin energies, this double helix spiraling, this interwoven ascendency of flame and light that I feel at my core, that I am? It's certainly not little Georgie though he does his part in staying open to this indwelling flowthrough of cosmic energies.

When we are young, we choose our role models, consciously or unconsciously. And maybe they also choose us because we have some kind of raw material that suits, like a cookie dough that is primarily suited for only one kind of cookie. The dough boy or dough girl chooses the cookie type s/he will become and the cookie type also calls the dough into shaping and firing. I chose Jesus, Hopalong Cassidy, Michael the Archangel, and Gene Autry.

I saw early on, as a kid, that I had to leave my heart open no matter how much it got hurt. I also saw that to lie down in the road and let others leave their tire tracks across your face was no good. One had to have an open heart while standing up to whatever came. Voila! Warrior.

Now I could go into the sociopsychological and cultural influences that shape a person, that shape us all, but that was not "what led me to the peaceful spot" I am now. I was taken and shaken. My awareness was opened dramatically yet lovingly to knowing that I am an embodying of the cosmos, of the Source, of the Wellspring. I was 12. I have written of it elsewhere. That awareness continues to fine tune itself. I look like little Georgie but I have stars in my eyes.

I am peaceful because I trust That-Which-Breathes-Me. As Rumi says, "Whoever brought me here will have to take me home." I know that Whoever. I am a warrior because I have no fear. I am the Source sourcing and so are we all.

Thank you, dear neighbor, for asking the question.